In fact, I have never been of a
complaining disposition. I seem born to be buffeted by friends and
fortune, and nature has made me a careless endurer of buffetings.
I now, however, began to grow very impatient of remaining at school, to
be flogged for things that I did not like. I longed for variety,
especially now that I had not my uncle's to resort to, by way of
diversifying the dullness of school with the dreariness of his country
seat. I was now turned of sixteen; tall for my age, and full of idle
fancies. I had a roving, inextinguishable desire to see different kinds
of life, and different orders of society; and this vagrant humor had
been fostered in me by Tom Dribble, the prime wag and great genius of
the school, who had all the rambling propensities of a poet.
I used to set at my desk in the school, on a fine summer's day, and
instead of studying the book which lay open before me, my eye was
gazing through the window on the green fields and blue hills. How I
envied the happy groups seated on the tops of stage-coaches, chatting,
and joking, and laughing, as they were whirled by the school-house, on
their way to the metropolis. Even the wagoners trudging along beside
their ponderous teams, and traversing the kingdom, from one end to the
other, were objects of envy to me. I fancied to myself what adventures
they must experience, and what odd scenes of life they must witness.
All this was doubtless the poetical temperament working within me, and
tempting me forth into a world of its own creation, which I mistook for
the world of real life.
While my mother lived, this strange propensity to roam was counteracted
by the stronger attractions of home, and by the powerful ties of
affection, which drew me to her side; but now that she was gone, the
attractions had ceased; the ties were severed. I had no longer an
anchorage ground for my heart; but was at the mercy of every vagrant
impulse. Nothing but the narrow allowance on which my father kept me,
and the consequent penury of my purse, prevented me from mounting the
top of a stage-coach and launching myself adrift on the great ocean of
life.
Just about this time the village was agitated for a day or two, by the
passing through of several caravans, containing wild beasts, and other
spectacles for a great fair annually held at a neighboring town.
I had never seen a fair of any consequence, and my curiosity was
Powerfully awakened by this bustle of preparation. I gazed with respect
and wonder at the vagrant personages who accompanied these caravans. I
loitered about the village inn, listening with curiosity and delight to
the slang talk and cant jokes of the showmen and their followers; and I
felt an eager desire to witness this fair, which my fancy decked out as
something wonderfully fine.
