I have then
considered myself as a particle broken off from the grand mass of
mankind; I was alone, till some involuntary sympathetic emotion,
like the attraction of adhesion, made me feel that I was still a
part of a mighty whole, from which I could not sever myself - not,
perhaps, for the reflection has been carried very far, by snapping
the thread of an existence, which loses its charms in proportion as
the cruel experience of life stops or poisons the current of the
heart. Futurity, what hast thou not to give to those who know that
there is such a thing as happiness! I speak not of philosophical
contentment, though pain has afforded them the strongest conviction
of it.
After our coffee and milk - for the mistress of the house had been
roused long before us by her hospitality - my baggage was taken
forward in a boat by my host, because the car could not safely have
been brought to the house.
The road at first was very rocky and troublesome, but our driver was
careful, and the horses accustomed to the frequent and sudden
acclivities and descents; so that, not apprehending any danger, I
played with my girl, whom I would not leave to Marguerite's care, on
account of her timidity.
Stopping at a little inn to bait the horses, I saw the first
countenance in Sweden that displeased me, though the man was better
dressed than any one who had as yet fallen in my way. An
altercation took place between him and my host, the purport of which
I could not guess, excepting that I was the occasion of it, be it
what it would. The sequel was his leaving the house angrily; and I
was immediately informed that he was the custom-house officer. The
professional had indeed effaced the national character, for, living
as he did within these frank hospitable people, still only the
exciseman appeared, the counterpart of some I had met with in
England and France. I was unprovided with a passport, not having
entered any great town. At Gothenburg I knew I could immediately
obtain one, and only the trouble made me object to the searching my
trunks. He blustered for money; but the lieutenant was determined
to guard me, according to promise, from imposition.
To avoid being interrogated at the town-gate, and obliged to go in
the rain to give an account of myself (merely a form) before we
could get the refreshment we stood in need of, he requested us to
descend - I might have said step - from our car, and walk into town.
I expected to have found a tolerable inn, but was ushered into a
most comfortless one; and, because it was about five o'clock, three
or four hours after their dining hour, I could not prevail on them
to give me anything warm to eat.
