Life On The Mississippi By Mark Twain




















































































































































 -  ORDERS is what you want!  Dod dern my skin, I'LL learn you to
swell yourself up and blow around here - Page 170
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ORDERS Is What You Want!

Dod dern my skin, I'LL learn you to swell yourself up and blow around here about your dod-derned ORDERS! G'way from the wheel!' (I had approached it without knowing it.)

I moved back a step or two, and stood as in a dream, all my senses stupefied by this frantic assault.

'What you standing there for? Take that ice-pitcher down to the texas- tender-come, move along, and don't you be all day about it!'

The moment I got back to the pilot-house, Brown said -

'Here! What was you doing down there all this time?'

'I couldn't find the texas-tender; I had to go all the way to the pantry.'

'Derned likely story! Fill up the stove.'

I proceeded to do so. He watched me like a cat. Presently he shouted -

'Put down that shovel! Deadest numskull I ever saw - ain't even got sense enough to load up a stove.'

All through the watch this sort of thing went on. Yes, and the subsequent watches were much like it, during a stretch of months. As I have said, I soon got the habit of coming on duty with dread. The moment I was in the presence, even in the darkest night, I could feel those yellow eyes upon me, and knew their owner was watching for a pretext to spit out some venom on me. Preliminarily he would say -

'Here! Take the wheel.'

Two minutes later -

'WHERE in the nation you going to?

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