The Look-Outs Were Then Set,
And Every Man Was Put In His Station.
When I heard what was the
state of things, I began to put on my clothes to stand it
Out
with the rest of them, when the mate came below, and looking at
my face, ordered me back to my berth, saying that if we went down,
we should all go down together, but if I went on deck I might lay
myself up for life. This was the first word I had heard from aft;
for the captain had done nothing, nor inquired how I was, since I
went below.
In obedience to the mate's orders, I went back to my berth; but a
more miserable night I never wish to spend. I never felt the curse
of sickness so keenly in my life. If I could only have been on deck
with the rest, where something was to be done, and seen, and heard;
where there were fellow-beings for companions in duty and danger - but
to be cooped up alone in a black hole, in equal danger, but without the
power to do, was the hardest trial. Several times, in the course of
the night, I got up, determined to go on deck; but the silence which
showed that there was nothing doing, and the knowledge that I might
make myself seriously ill, for nothing, kept me back. It was not
easy to sleep, lying, as I did, with my head directly against the
bows, which might be dashed in by an island of ice, brought down
by the very next sea that struck her.
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