It Was Through An Introduction Given Me By A Valued English Friend That I,
As An English Stranger, Was Received With The Kindest Hospitality By Some
Of Those Who Have Been Rendered Thus Exclusive By The Bad Taste And Worse
Conduct Of Foreigners.
I feel, as I write, that any remarks I make on New
York society cannot be perfectly free from bias, owing to the overwhelming
kindness and glowing hospitality which I met with in that city.
I found so
much to enjoy in society, and so much to interest and please everywhere,
that when I left New York it was with the wish that the few weeks which I
was able to spend there could have been prolonged into as many months.
But, to answer the question. The best society in New York would not suffer
by comparison in any way with the best society in England. It is not in
the upper classes of any nation that we must look for national
characteristics or peculiarities. Society throughout the civilized world
is, to a certain extent, cast in the same mould; the same laws of
etiquette prevail, and the same conventionalisms restrict in great measure
the display of any individual characteristics. Balls are doubtless the
same in "society" all over the world; a certain amount of black cloth, kid
gloves, white muslin, epaulettes if they can be procured, dancing, music,
and ices. Every one acknowledges that dinner-parties are equally dull in
London and Paris, in Calcutta and in New York, unless the next neighbour
happens to be peculiarly agreeable. Therefore, it is most probable that
balls and dinner-parties are in New York exactly the same as in other
places, except that the latter are less numerous, and are principally
confined to gentlemen. It is not, in fact, convenient to give dinner
parties in New York; there are not sufficient domestics to bear the
pressure of an emergency, and the pleasure is not considered worth the
trouble. If two or three people have sufficient value for the society of
the host and hostess to come in to an ordinary dinner, at an ordinary
hour, they are welcome. If turtle and venison were offered on such an
occasion, it would have the effect of repelling, rather than attracting,
the guests, and it would not have the effect of making them believe that
their host and hostess always lived on such luxurious viands.
As dinner-parties are neither deemed agreeable nor convenient, and as many
sensible people object to the late hours and general dissipation of mind
produced by balls and large dancing parties, a happy innovation upon old
customs has been made, and early evening receptions have been introduced.
Some of the most splendid mansions of New York, as well as the most
agreeable, are now thrown open weekly for the reception of visitors in a
social manner. These receptions differ from what are known by the same
name in London. The crowd in which people become wedged, in a vain attempt
to speak to the hostess, is as much as possible avoided; late hours are
abandoned; the guests, who usually arrive about eight, are careful to
disappear shortly after eleven, lest, Cinderella-like, the hostess should
vanish. Then, again, all the guests feel themselves on a perfect equality,
as people always ought to do who meet in the same room, on the invitation
of the same hostess. [Footnote: The Americans justly ridicule that species
of bad breeding which leads people at parties to draw back from others,
from a fear that their condescension should fall upon ground unconsecrated
by the dictatorial fiat of "society." An amusing instance of the effect of
this pride, which occurred in England, was related. Some years ago the
illustrious Baron Humboldt was invited to play the part of lion at the
house of a nobleman. A select circle of fashionables appeared, and among
the company a man very plainly dressed and not noticeable in appearance.
He spoke first to one person, and then to another: some drew themselves up
with a haughty stare; others answered in monosyllables; but all repulsed
the Baron; and it was not until late in the evening, after he had departed
early, disgusted with this ungracious reception, that these people knew
that by their conduct they had lost the advantage of the conversation of
one of the greatest men of the age.]
The lady of the house adopts the old but very sensible fashion of
introducing people to each other, which helps to prevent a good deal of
stiffness. As the rooms in the New York houses are generally large, people
sit, stand, or walk about as they feel inclined, or group themselves round
some one gifted with peculiar conversational powers. At all of these re-
unions there was a great deal of conversation worth listening to or
joining in, and, as a stranger, I had the advantage of being introduced to
every one who was considered worth knowing. Poets, historians, and men of
science are to be met with frequently at these receptions; but they do not
go as lions, but to please and be pleased; and such men as Longfellow,
Prescott, or Washington Irving may be seen mixing with the general throng
with so much bonhommie and simplicity, that none would fancy that in
their own land they are the envy of their age, and sustain world-wide
reputations. The way in which literary lions are exhibited in England, as
essential to the éclat of fashionable parties, is considered by the
Americans highly repugnant to good taste. I was very agreeably surprised
with the unaffected manners and extreme simplicity of men eminent in the
scientific and literary world.
These evening receptions are a very happy idea; for people, whose business
or inclinations would not permit them to meet in any other way, are thus
brought together without formality or expense. The conversation generally
turned on Europe, general literature, art, science, or the events of the
day.
Enter page number
PreviousNext
Page 102 of 128
Words from 103271 to 104270
of 129941
