I slaughtered two bullocks,
and had a barbacue; three sheep, two goats, and fifteen chickens,
120 lbs. of rice, twenty large loaves of bread made of Indian
corn-flour, one hundred eggs, 10 lbs. of butter, and five gallons
of sweet-milk, were the contents of which the banquet was formed.
The men invited their friends and neighbours, and about one hundred
women and children partook of it.
After the banquet was ended, the pombe, or native beer, was brought
in in five gallon pots, and the people commenced their dance,
which continues even now as I write.
September 19th. - I had a slight attack of fever to-day, which has
postponed our departure. Selim and Shaw are both recovered.
About 8 P.M. Sheik bin Nasib came to me imploring me not to go
away to-morrow, because I was so sick. Thani Sakhburi suggested
to me that I might stay another month. In answer, I told them
that white men are not accustomed to break their words. I had
said I would go, and I intended to go.
Sheikh bin Nasib gave up all hope of inducing me to remain another
day, and he has gone away, with a promise to write to Seyd Burghash
to tell him how obstinate I am; and that I am determined to be
killed. This was a parting shot.
About 10 P.M. the fever had gone. All were asleep in the tembe
but myself, and an unutterable loneliness came on me as I reflected
on my position, and my intentions, and felt the utter lack of
sympathy with me in all around. It requires more nerve than I
possess, to dispel all the dark presentiments that come upon the
mind. But probably what I call presentiments are simply the
impress on the mind of the warnings which these false-hearted Arabs
have repeated so often. This melancholy and loneliness I feel,
may probably have their origin from the same cause. The single
candle, which barely lights up the dark shade that fills the
corners of my room, is but a poor incentive to cheerfulness.
I feel as though I were imprisoned between stone walls. But why
should I feel as if baited by these stupid, slow-witted Arabs and
their warnings and croakings? I fancy a suspicion haunts my
mind, as I write, that there lies some motive behind all this.
I wonder if these Arabs tell me all these things to keep me here,
in the hope that I might be induced another time to assist them
in their war with Mirambo! If they think so, they are much
mistaken, for I have taken a solemn, enduring oath, an oath to be
kept while the least hope of life remains in me, not to be tempted
to break the resolution I have formed, never to give up the search,
until I find Livingstone alive, or find his dead body; and never
to return home without the strongest possible proofs that he is
alive, or that he is dead.
