The Person Whom Nyakoba Appointed To Be Our Guide, Having Informed Us
Of The Decision, Came And Bargained That His Services Should Be Rewarded
With A Hoe.
I had no objection to give it, and showed him the article;
he was delighted with it, and went off to show it to his wife.
He soon afterward returned, and said that, though he was perfectly
willing to go, his wife would not let him.
I said, "Then bring back the hoe;"
but he replied, "I want it." "Well, go with us, and you shall have it."
"But my wife won't let me." I remarked to my men, "Did you ever hear
such a fool?" They answered, "Oh, that is the custom of these parts;
the wives are the masters." And Sekwebu informed me that he had gone
to this man's house, and heard him saying to his wife, "Do you think
that I would ever leave you?" then, turning to Sekwebu, he asked,
"Do you think I would leave this pretty woman? Is she not pretty?"
Sekwebu had been making inquiries among the people, and had found
that the women indeed possessed a great deal of influence.
We questioned the guide whom we finally got from Nyakoba,
an intelligent young man, who had much of the Arab features,
and found the statements confirmed. When a young man takes a liking
for a girl of another village, and the parents have no objection to the match,
he is obliged to come and live at their village. He has to perform
certain services for the mother-in-law, such as keeping her well supplied
with firewood; and when he comes into her presence he is obliged to sit
with his knees in a bent position, as putting out his feet toward the old lady
would give her great offense. If he becomes tired of living
in this state of vassalage, and wishes to return to his own family,
he is obliged to leave all his children behind - they belong to the wife.
This is only a more stringent enforcement of the law from which emanates
the practice which prevails so very extensively in Africa,
known to Europeans as "buying wives". Such virtually it is,
but it does not appear quite in that light to the actors.
So many head of cattle or goats are given to the parents of the girl
"to give her up", as it is termed, i.e., to forego all claim on her offspring,
and allow an entire transference of her and her seed into another family.
If nothing is given, the family from which she has come can claim the children
as part of itself: the payment is made to sever this bond.
In the case supposed, the young man has not been able to advance any thing
for that purpose; and, from the temptations placed here before my men,
I have no doubt that some prefer to have their daughters married in that way,
as it leads to the increase of their own village.
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